Couldn't sleep! I was walking around all night driving my parents crazy. I couldn't play the radio at all, even quiet they heard it. Anyway I wasn't hearing anything. So I ended up just laying awake all night. After all the stuff about Cameron everybody kept talking about what they were going to do with their lives. I am not even out of school yet. I have a lot I want to do but haven't gotten any inspiration about one thing to go for. Is that bad? Everybody else (almost everybody) seems to have a pretty serious view about what they are going to "be". How about just happy? Yeah I know that doesn't pay bills LOL I am already worried about paying bills- wouldn't that make dad happy to know I worry too. I know the things I love. I hope that I'll be able to make a living doing one or two of them.
The other problem is Cameron . I couldn't stop thinking about him. He is my friend and I never thought of him as anything other than a brother-type. I have known him all my life! Watching him play guitar and talk about stuff to do with that- well he seemed different. I came home and I'm wondering about stuff he has done. Like at school once I teased him about liking his silver backpack.
So the next day he gives it to me! Thought it was funny and nice, he said he got a cool messenger type bag anyway. Then I am the one he calls to tell all his news first. I think back about a lot of stuff he has said and done and now its driving me crazy! I am probably imagining stuff. We are nothing alike. I always like the dark haired guys like Dylan and Eitan even tho Eitan is actually very strange and almost mean sometimes (the "tortured artist" lol). Jade always tells me I am going to marry Dylan, so just because of that I say NO back to her LOL. But he's nice and cute and we get along but I never even thot of Cam as anything but this nice guy. GRR! Dad always teases me when something is hard "Nothing is ever easy darling girl!". Hate to admit he's right!
Well we are all getting together for the weekend. I am not sure about all the plans but I think I am going to be stuck cooking something since Yasmin told me I had to come up with some kind of crafty project and I couldn't. She can get bossy too, but she does it in a funny way so you don't know. This weekend will be very interesting.
Now of course in the middle of the day I am about to fall over asleep! Over and out.
oops almost forgot- Have a great weekend!
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